Calling all those who are living away from their families! How do you do it?
Let me explain... if you know me, to say I love being around my family is a understatement. I don't know what I would do without them. I am the kind of person who would LOVE to live right next door to my parents, or even live with them. If you think I am crazy I may be. We lived with my in-laws over the summer and I even loved that! I HATE HATE HATE being so far away from my family. All of my siblings live within 5 minutes of my parents house, except me. I hate that. I hate not being around for game nights, sunday night movies, bachelorette/bachelor parties, birthdays, holidays, craft days, going to my moms for lunch and dinner, running errands with my mom, hanging out with my niece and nephews... I really could keep going but I think you have the idea. While I am at home and doing these things it doesn't seem like that big of a deal but when I am here and they are doing them I would give just about anything to be there with them! I hate being so far away and not being able to see my family everyday and just hang out like all my siblings get to do. I am so jealous of my sisters and how close they are. I know I am selfish when I say I hate that my 2 new nephews won't get to know me that well and I wont get to be their favorite aunt (like I am to all the others :)). I have always wanted my kids to grow up close to their cousins and be best friends with them, but being so far away I don't think this can happen while they are young (not an announcement ...)
I know that it was my choice to live here but it still doesn't make it any easier. I am not a big fan of talking on the phone (no joke, I have to set goals to call my mom more), so that also doesn't really help. I am alway too busy to Skype or other things like that, so unless I am at home I don't really see or talk to my family. I find out more from Facebook sometimes... sad isn't it? I know. So this is where I need you. If you are like me and are a home body how do you deal with living far away from your family? What has worked for you? Is there anything? Babe and I were talking about when we might be moving to chiropractic school and that we'll be even further away (I thought the 4 hours was bad...). I was crying the whole way home from Inkom thinking about being so far away. So please, I need your help. It might not seem like that big of a deal to you but to me it is huge. What works best? I know in the long run 5 years or so won't be that long and then we can move back home, but in the moment it's going to seem like forever! Is there any secret I was left out on that you all would share with me now? Thanks all, and any suggestions are welcome :)
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| Craven Family |
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| Hunt Family |
This would all be so much easier if I didn't have such an amazing family and in-laws.... Ugh! Why do I have to be sooo blessed ;)
You sound like Drake! He gets that way where he'd literally like to live with his parents, and I love being with my family, but I don't have the same struggle as you two. We basically do what you are doing, and I wish I had a secret for you, but what I try to do is focus on what you mentioned: it's just for a little while. Growing up, I wanted to go somewhere bigger for college (hence, Provo) because I had always been in smalltown Marsh Valley and I knew I wanted to experience something different for a while BUT I knew I'd want to settle down where I grew up with grandparents near to my children and all that. But just think that these are the times of our lives to be away on exciting adventures! I always hear about my mom's college adventures and the sacrifices she had to make and the memories she made. Being away gives you and Matt time to form a family on your own with your own ideas, and one day you'll tell your kids about them- and of course one day soon (even though it doesn't feel that way) soon we'll be surrounded by family again :) haha I know I'm no help, but at least you know there are other people out there like you!
ReplyDeleteI remember when Mike called to tell me he had gotten accepted to school in Bryan..."That's great Babe! Way to go! What an adventure" Hang up the phone...BAWL! I cried all the way to Texas, and then some.
ReplyDeleteLots of good things can happen away too--it's fun to be together, it's fun to make friends who REALLY become family, it's fun to serve in a ward where people rely on each other. It's tough though--to know about Sunday night dinners, FHE that you're missing, spontaneous lunches. For me it was the spontaneous stuff the I missed the most--and that I love the most about living close now.
As for tips--don't have any. Phone calls were good. Make a good friend--like Ashley. We made great friends in Bryan and then heaven sent friends in Houston, that made all the difference for me. Serve--we had somebody over for dinner once a week; helped us to meet new people and reach out and serve and once in a while we found someone we loved! I loved getting mail--maybe we will start sending you some! Let's plan a girls weekend for this summer, that would be awesome fun. Isn't there some sort of education week up there for Women? Let's plan to do it together! That would be super awesome! And, I'll send my kiddos up to you anytime you want--let's make a plan! Katelyn would love to come and hang out with you, and Josh too. Luke would be crazy, but I'll send the new baby up indefinitely when he comes~! Try to start your own family traditions. Go see something new...if I had known how short of a time we would have been in Texas, I would have made a better effort to see it all/do it all. There has got to be something in Rexburg you haven't done or seen.
My mom told me once that the best thing for her & my dad's marriage was being on their own together in a college town, away from family. It helped them draw closer together, depend on each other more, and made their marriage stronger. It seems like lots of young married couples make close friends during college, because their friends become their family during that time. So I think you'll find others just like you who need friendship and support while away from family. We definitely miss living near our immediate families, but it helps us appreciate the time when we do get together. And we learn to rely on those around us...like your family...to be our family! :)
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