I wasn't sure how much of our story I wanted to share but I realized that Infertility is not something to suffer in silence with. It's hard and very lonely. There were time that even when Babe was there I felt alone, and broken. I felt like my body couldn't do the thing it was supposed to. What was I doing wrong? We tried for a year and a half to get pregnant with Jenson, so we started trying for another one earlier thinking it would be easier for us, but if not we had some time. After a year of trying for baby #2 on our own we decided to go to my OBGYN for some help. He ran some tests, and did some blood work. We found out that I don't ovulate every month, and when I do I have very low progesterone so the chance of getting pregnant and staying pregnant were pretty slim. He put me on a few other drugs but they were not really doing anything so I stopped taking them. Every month I would track my "ovulation" take some progesterone then go and get a blood test to see if my levels were high enough. Normally your progesterone is somewhere around a 15 mine was around a 2-4. A few months I would get up into the 20s and would be positive I would get pregnant. And still nothing. We had Babe go and get tested as well, he came back with a low sperm count and he could do some surgery to help but it wasn't guaranteed and if it worked it could take up to 2 years to even boost his sperm. So we decided to just continue with tracking my periods and taking the progesterone pills. After a blood tests every month and trying the pills, I was getting more depressed. My OB decided to do a 3 hour glucose test to see if I was having issue with my insulin. If you know me you know I HATE needles and getting my blood drawn. I have terrible veins and they have a hard time finding them. I was dreading the test but it's crazy what you will do for even the hope of having a baby. The test came back normal, so we were pretty much right back to where we started. I loved my doctor as a person but was not satisfied with the service we were getting. I never got my test results back and I felt like I was having to pull teeth to even try something else besides progesterone.
You always here to "not stress, it will happen when it happens.." okay thats WAY more easier said then done. I think we were stressing about it way to much that it was hindering our chances of getting pregnant. After some prayers and a leap of faith I decided to stop all the drugs I had been given from my OB. With Babe in school for chiropractic we decided to go the more natural route. If it didn't end up working then at least we tried it, just like with the other medications. We found some amazing chiropractors close to our house and all started to go see them. They took some x-rays of my spine and neck. It was such a relief to see that my issues were not all in my head, my body was messed up. She explained to me that one of the reasons I could be having troubles is because I was so out of wack that my body was giving everything it could to my more vital organs (making my ovaries not work as well as they should be.) She obviously explained it more eloquent then that but you get the idea. We both started getting adjusted 3 times a week and I could already tell a difference. I wasn't having head aces and my lower back pain was almost non existent. After 2 months of faithful adjustments we had a sit down consolation to talk about our infertility.
We talked about some of the main issues of infertility, the most being stress. She gave us some really good ideas on how to help eliminate stress. Just 2 days prior we had a meeting with one of Babes teachers about essential oils and decided to buy a kit of them to defuse. Which was a blessing because that was one of the things our chiropractor mentioned. We decided we needed to make our home a calm and safe place to be. We started defusing some lavender to help us calm down for bed time, I was reading some conference talks, we got better about eating real meals, and playing together more as a family- enjoying our time now instead of always looking to the future and seeing what we were missing. Not getting pregnant every month was still so heartbreaking but it was more do able. I also got a Clary Calm blend and would put it all over my stomach at bed time.
Just for a time frame we had been a little over 2 and a half years trying for baby #2 by now. We were both feeling so much better about what we were doing now then what we had tried from the OB. We had a really good schedule going and things were looking up for us because after about a month of adjustments and oils I took a pregnancy test!!
I knew my period was supposed to come any day now but I just couldn't wait any longer. I took a test knowing I would see 2 lines. I waited the 2 minutes and BAM- negative. I was heart broken but was so used to only seeing one line it was not that big of a surprise. I told Babe I wasn't pregnant and got ready for my period to come. I waited for 3 days and still nothing, so not trying to get my hopes up I took the last pregnancy test we had. But this time to my complete shock I saw a second line. Could this really be happening? Was my test so old that it's false? I woke up Jenson and we ran to the store to get another one. I took it and again there was a second line. I wanted to burst out in tears but I couldn't even wrap my head around it. I just sat there in the bathroom looking at the test and making sure the line wouldn't disappear. I went to my room and dropped to my knees and thanked my Heavenly Father for the chance to finally be pregnant again, and even if I wasn't able to keep it for the hope of seeing 2 lines again!
A few months before I had bought Jenson a "most awesome big brother" shirt (in a few sizes up, just hoping I would be pregnant by then!) I put it on him and waited for Babe to get home. It took him FOREVER to read the shirt. He was even playing on the ground with him, tickling him, and chasing him around. Finally I just told him to read Jenson's shirt. He was so confused because just 2 days earlier I told him I wasn't pregnant. Still I think we were both just in shock. We went to Shawnee Mission Park to go walk around and enjoy our little secret as a family of 3, soon to be 4!
The next day we called and told our parents the good news. We knew that so many people were praying for us to finally get pregnant so we wanted some prayers for the baby now. It was the first time that it actually seemed real. I was facetiming my parents asking them about their summer plans because they were going to go on a cruise and I wanted to make sure it wasn't right when I was due. I asked them if they would be willing to come up in June when I had a baby. I broke down and finally all the tears that I had felt inside me the last fews days came streaming out. It was finally real to me, I was actually pregnant. After years of trying our little miracle baby was on the way.